A friend recently asked “But I though Rory was sleeping through the night occasionally?”, and I realised it had been a really long time since I’d written a Rory update.
Oh, how I wish we were still in the days where I’d put him down at 7pm. confident that he wouldn’t wake until at least 1am, and sometimes being surprised that he slept all the way through to 6am.
Nope. We got hit by the start of teething, consecutive colds and bugs, and the infamous sleep regression (that Arlo never recovered from) all at around the four month mark.
Rory will be six months old in a couple of weeks, and his sleep hasn’t recovered. I’m past the point of expecting it to. Waking every couple of hours and spending my evenings running up and down the stairs to him is the new normal.
I had a feeling that he would regress. And having no motivation to ‘fix’ his ‘sleep issues’, I also knew that were it to happen, it would likely be a permanent change, as I will always feed him if he cries, I will always allow him to fall asleep whilst feeding …and what baby wouldn’t prefer to fall asleep this way?
Similarly to Arlo at this age, Rory is just not napping. He sleeps for 20 minutes maximum. I don’t think there is any particular reason for the short naps, they seem to happen regardless of any particular situation that day. But with the preschool run breaking up the day and a noisy toddler in the house, I might as well forget about trying to forge a good nap routine at the moment. Like Arlo, I’m sure his naps will lengthen as he gets older.
One thing I’ve noticed recently, is just how many people ( individuals and organisations involved in baby sleep) offer their advice when I say he’s not sleeping well. It’s not that I don’t believe in sleep training, or that I’m resolutely against it … it’s just… I’ve read all the books, I did all of that first time round with Arlo, and I’ve learnt that I am much happier and less stressed out if I just allow myself to go with the flow, deal with the particularly bad nights, and accept the whole thing as one big long phase. Focusing on what Rory should be doing, and what I could be doing to improve things, only serves to make me miserable.
Anyway, back on topic.. Rory: You continue to be a chilled out, cheerful baby. You reserve your best smiles for your family, whilst people you don’t recognise receive a shy smile – this is really different to Arlo, who was very free giving with the smiles.
But no one in the world can make you smile and giggle as much as your brother. When you turned four months you started thinking Arlo was the best thing ever.
As Sam put it, when we discussed having another child we thought about how good it would be for Arlo. You were a stranger to us at that point, only a part of our imaginations. It didn’t enter our heads how nice it might be for the younger sibling too.
Arlo continues to delight you, and it delights us.